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Episode 105: “Did I Miss the Memo?”

Synopsis

Until recently, Dr. Misner assumed that if he made an appointment with someone, he was going to be there, but there seems to be an emerging trend requiring people to confirm the appointment closer to the actual day. People have been saying “When I didn’t hear from you, I assumed it was off.”

Dr. Misner wants to state for the record that if you make an appointment with him, it’s firm, unless you hear otherwise. And he believes that should go for any BNI member: if you make an appointment, people should be able to count on you to show up.

BNI members who treat the BNI meeting like an appointment with prospects and business associates are much more likely to be successful. You don’t want to miss an appointment with your best referral partners. The chapters that understand this are the strongest.

Brought to you by Networking Now.

Complete Transcription of BNI Podcast Episode 105 -

Priscilla:
Hello everyone, and welcome back to The Official BNI Podcast brought to you by NetworkingNow.com, which is the leading site on the Net for networking downloadables.

I’m Priscilla Rice, and I’m coming to you from the beautiful Live Oak Recording Studio in Berkley, California, and I am joined on the phone today by the founder and the chairman of BNI, Dr. Ivan Misner.

Hello, Ivan, and how are you?

Ivan:
I’m doing great, Priscilla. And I still want to know, did I miss the memo?

Priscilla:
I think you might have, but what does that mean to our listeners?

Ivan:
Well, there seems to be a new trend in keeping appointments that I was completely unaware of until recently. You see, I’ve always operated under the assumption that when I set an appointment with someone for a meeting, a breakfast, a lunch, or some kind of face-to-face engagement that it’s presumed that I’m going to be there unless I notify them otherwise.

Priscilla:
Yeah.

Ivan:
However, it’s recently come to my attention that I’m apparently no longer safe in assuming that that’s the case. Just last week I received this frantic call from a friend of mine who had confirmed a lunch meeting with me a few weeks earlier. And he called because he seemed uncertain if we were still on for lunch. I thought it was really interesting because he was about 90 minutes away by car, and he hadn’t left yet, and the lunch was in 30 minutes. So I was a little frustrated by that.

More and more I’m experiencing scenarios that are really similar to this, and there seems to be this emerging trend now. I’m beginning to see that if you schedule an appointment and don’t hear from the other party again before the scheduled date and time, this means that the appointment has been magically and mysteriously cancelled by the appointment fairies. Now, I’m not alone in this either, because my wife, Beth, had the same experience last week with a group of ladies that she was planning a brunch for. One of the women said, “When I didn’t hear from you over the weekend, I presumed it was off.”

Priscilla:
Yeah.

Ivan:
She was told that my one of the five ladies who didn’t show up.

I just want to know, when did this start happening? Did I miss the memo? Maybe it’s tied to the reminder call system that most of my doctors are using now where the front desk has the task of calling clients a day or two before their appointment to remind them that the doctor is expecting them at such-and-such time.

Now, my wife, Beth, told me that spas and beauty salons are now doing the same thing, but I really can’t vouch for that from personal experience. How about it, Priscilla, do they do that? Do the spas and beauty salons do that?

Priscilla:
Definitely. Especially the beauty salons; that’s what I can vouch for. Yeah, they do; they have to.

Ivan:
Well, if the doctors didn’t have the front desk call me to remind, or if the spas didn’t call you for you appointment and we went ahead and presumed that the appointment was cancelled because they didn’t call, I wonder if they would waive the no-show fee for not showing up. What do you think?

Priscilla:
No, I don’t think they would.

Ivan:
Probably not. So I’m just kind of stating for the record that if you set an appointment with me, it’s firm unless you hear otherwise, and I think that’s the way it should be for any business person. We’re all part of a networking organization, and we have to have a commitment to our fellow BNI members and to other business professionals that if we set up an appointment, we going to be there. Unfortunately, there seems to be some new trend coming on that when it comes to an appointment protocol and I’m just asking, “Can someone please send me the memo, because I must have missed the last one on this one.”

Priscilla:
You know, Ivan, I think it’s because we’re on such an overload, to be honest with you, that people are completely overscheduled and inundated with information, and it’s their way of handling things. That’s what I think, but it’s very rude, so I’m with you on that.

Ivan:
It is. And all joking aside, I am seeing it start to happen more and more, and I think it’s almost a self-sustaining kind of problem. Because it’s happened more and more, people are starting to call just to confirm that everything is still one, and so there’s this sense of, well, this person didn’t call, so it must not be on, which is just crazy to me.

And I think that this is really relevant in BNI, don’t you? Isn’t a BNI meeting a little bit like an appointment?

Priscilla:
It is like an appointment, and it’s one that you’ve made a commitment to for the whole year other than a few absences.

Ivan:
Yeah, I know that this is sort of a side issue from the main discussion, but I think it’s an important one. BNI members who treat the BNI meetings like an appointment with prospects and fellow business associates are much more likely to be successful in this program, because these are appointments. These are appointments with your best referral partners, and you don’t want to miss an appointment with your best referral partners. It’s very important. I think that the chapters who have this sense of accountability where the members understand that this is an appointment and you need to treat it like a good appointment should be treated, and you don’t want to just not show up and have a poor attendance at the – I think that those people tend to be stronger business professionals and more successful, and they certainly are going to build better relationships because of their regular participation in the local chapters.

Priscilla:
Yeah, I agree. So we all need to be there. I agree with you.

Ivan:
Well, I’m not going to send a memo, so this podcast is going to have to do the trick. So everybody, if you set an appointment, be there, and treat your BNI meetings like an appointment.

Thanks, Priscilla.

Priscilla:
Okay, great, Dr. Misner. Thank you so much.

Well, that’s it for this week. I just want to remind the listeners that this podcast has been brought to you by NetworkingNow.com, which is the leading site on the Net for networking downloadables. Thanks so much for listening. This is Priscilla Rice, and we hope you’ll join us next week for another exciting episode of The Official BNI Podcast.

6 Comments On This Post

  1. After waiting an hour for an appointment to show up I finally reached him by phone and he said he thought that we weren’t meeting because he didn’t hear from me after his confirmation email. I asked him why he felt that I had to reconfirm his confirmation to my confirmation to his request of a meeting?!?!

    Thank you for standing up for commitment and sharing it in the podcast.

  2. I love it. I do get a call from my hair stylist and doctor for my visits, but I haven’t noticed this happening in the BNI meetings and appointments with fellow BNI members yet…. I hope it doesn’t get to that, I don’t have time to babysit everyone else…

  3. I agree with Dr. Misner’s reaction to this phenomenon of consider that if I set an appointment with someone, then it is firm unless I call and change it. I think that it has grown out of the fact that we are all so busy and that we forget all the details and need so many reminders to complete our tasks. My friends are always complaining about forgetting things. It is sad that we need to have someone call us to remind us about a doctor or spa appointment. We have created a society that now knows they don’t have to remember or keep track of things because someone will remind us.

  4. An excellent subject to highlight. Due to a couple of experiences I am never sure if an appointment is still on unless its confirmed the day before. Shouldn’t really be necessary but there have been several occasions where when I went to confirm the meeting/appointment, it was obvious that the other party had forgotten about it, so ringing to confirm saved me a lot of wasted time.
    However, I agree, once made the appointment should stand.
    My Friday BNI is not an appointment, it’s simply set in stone.

  5. I have come back to this podcast numerous times, simply because I think I missed the memo!

    I would like to add that ages ago, in college, my business instructor taught us to call to confirm about 2 hours before an interview, asking if it is still a good time. It allows us to appear a little more professional and know that we have lessened the chance of sitting and waiting. I still use that method, but am always stunned by the amount of surprised professionals who have “blanked” on the appointment.

  6. On the other hand, I got a confirmation email from my 11:00am One-on-One appointment this morning.

    Good thing she did, because she had my old address in her contact list for me. She would have been 33 miles away if we hadn’t confirmed.

    Lesson learned: “Let’s meet at your office” may not be the clearest instruction.

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  1. Boca Consultants » Respecting Appointments You Make

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